I've been meaning to comment on this. All your posts are great, and this one really struck a chord with me. I feel like it took me years to learn to ask for what I wanted (I must have been an odd child or gotten some weird messages from my parents, because I wanted my mom to just know what I wanted without my asking); over the years, I've (mostly) gotten better at it. I often have to remind my husband to ask; I think that in our culture it's even harder for men. I also remind him to talk to people about whatever's going on — whether you're looking for a job, a place to live, a dentist, a contractor, etc., you just never know what will result from telling everyone you know. When I quit my job at the end of last year to be a consultant, that's how I ended up getting a large percentage of my clients: I'd mentioned what I was doing to colleagues (who were also friends), and they sent work my way before I even started looking!
I like this. Related message is "tell everyone you meet and most people you don't that you're looking for a job". A lot of times people are embarrassed to openly talk about being "out of work" or they are too timid to get into an impromptu conversation about looking for work because they might not have a perfectly polished elevator speech ready for this exact circumstance. Forget that. TELL EVERYONE you're looking for work. You never know who might have some good advice or who might be hiring or who might know someone who can help you. If people don't know, they cannot help.
Great advice. It can be both intimidating and humbling to do this, but as you point out, most people like to help others when they can, especially if it's a friend or a friend of a friend.
I've been meaning to comment on this. All your posts are great, and this one really struck a chord with me. I feel like it took me years to learn to ask for what I wanted (I must have been an odd child or gotten some weird messages from my parents, because I wanted my mom to just know what I wanted without my asking); over the years, I've (mostly) gotten better at it. I often have to remind my husband to ask; I think that in our culture it's even harder for men. I also remind him to talk to people about whatever's going on — whether you're looking for a job, a place to live, a dentist, a contractor, etc., you just never know what will result from telling everyone you know. When I quit my job at the end of last year to be a consultant, that's how I ended up getting a large percentage of my clients: I'd mentioned what I was doing to colleagues (who were also friends), and they sent work my way before I even started looking!
I like this. Related message is "tell everyone you meet and most people you don't that you're looking for a job". A lot of times people are embarrassed to openly talk about being "out of work" or they are too timid to get into an impromptu conversation about looking for work because they might not have a perfectly polished elevator speech ready for this exact circumstance. Forget that. TELL EVERYONE you're looking for work. You never know who might have some good advice or who might be hiring or who might know someone who can help you. If people don't know, they cannot help.
Great advice. It can be both intimidating and humbling to do this, but as you point out, most people like to help others when they can, especially if it's a friend or a friend of a friend.